New Love Ball: A Ploy To Get the Girl
by sweet-and-simple
Summary: Over the past three years, Gumball had off and on fought with himself on the subject that was quite plainly a lovesick Fionna.  To date her or to not date her, now that was the question.  And then Marshall Lee was dancing away with her...


Over the past three years, Gumball had off and on fought with himself on the subject that was quite plainly a lovesick Fionna. To date her or to not date her, now _that_ was the question. He never seemed to have the right answer at the right time, though.

The first time he had asked her out for instance, right after she had saved him from the dreaded Ice Queen during his Biennial Gumball Ball. Just earlier that very day, she would have fallen over herself to be his girlfriend. By nightfall, she had fallen out of love and left the party briskly after telling him straightforward that she didn't need romance to make her life.

Seven attempts later, he still could not determine when was and when wasn't the _moment_. She fawned over him when he was too engrossed in something (or someone) else to return her feelings and by the time he realized that, yes, _this_ was the girl he wanted, she had forsaken love yet again.

His seventh attempt actually ended with him running screaming from their tree house, a very angry Cake chasing after him because he had, or so she had said, "yanked my baby's heart-guts for the last time!" So could it still even be considered an attempt if he hadn't even gotten in the front door?

At least they were still on pal terms. Cake couldn't hate him forever because she was dating Lord Monochromicorn and they had been friends since Lord Monochromicorn had been a foal. Even if Lord Monochromicorn himself had outright told (or Morse coded) him that he was being ridiculous, he still managed to keep the peace between him and the demonic cat who continued to stare at him with bloodlust.

Prince Gumball was lying on his bed as he reviewed all his past failures. Perhaps he was being ridiculous but in the same breath Fionna was being unreasonable! Why couldn't they like each other at the same time without outside interferences? He would have to do something about this. Something… _drastic_.

"Peppermint butler!" he cried, and the candy treat came daintily into his chambers.

"Yes, your majesty?" she asked.

"I want you to organize a ball for me!"

"What for, your majesty?"

He thought about it for a moment. "For new love!"

.

Because he was a genius, he knew when and when not to approach the adventurers' tree house. The good time to do it, he knew with crystal clarity, was when Cake was on a date with Lord Monochromicorn… _away_ someplace.

He watched from a shrub as she and his friend ran off into the distant sunset with all the romanticism of a heart-shaped chocolate. Good. Now he just had to talk to Fionna! Privately.

He knocked on the door and the sounds of beat boxing and base stopped within. Wait, base? He frowned. He only knew one person who played base.

Fionna opened the door halfway and peered out at him.

"Oh, hey PG, what's up?"

He tried to look around her and ultimately failed. "Is Marshall Lee in there with you?"

"Uh, yeah. He's teaching me how to use his base. Isn't that awesome? Dude, I get to learn how to jam his strings!"

"Is that so?" he said weakly, and then remembered himself. "Fionna, I have something I must tell you!"

"Huh? What's that?"

"There's a ball tonight and you're invited! As my date!"

"Uuuuh…" she looked uncomfortable all of a sudden. "Geez, PG, I ca-"

"Can!" he finished for her. "That's good to know. I will be seeing you tonight then, yes?"

"Wait, PG!"

"Goodbye, Fionna!"

Fionna watched him leave with a pained expression and he didn't stop once to bother himself with the question of why that was. She would come, fall back in love with him, and _then_ they could finally get their timing right! Yes, it would definitely work.

He was a genius, after all. If he could reanimate the dead, he could undoubtedly reanimate love!

.

Fionna shut the door on a huff. "What the snuff was that about?" She wasn't even sure. Sure, she understood that she'd be going to a ball against her will as PG's date… but she didn't _feel_ like she'd understood what had just happened.

Why did she only ever learn of balls the night they were going to happen anyway?

"What did Pinky want?" Marshall Lee came floating down the stairs, strumming his base.

"Meh. I'm supposed to go to a ball with him. Tonight." She twiddled with her bunny ears. "I'm not really sure why… It just came out of nowhere."

"You going?" He twirled around her, turned over, and met her eye-for-eye belly-down on air.

She shrugged. "I don't think I really have a choice."

"Huh…"

They gave each other the infamous "derp derp" expression, where nothing could _really_ be said.

"Then who am _I_ going to take to the ball tonight?" Marshall Lee asked at last. He grabbed Fionna by her one hand and swung her around as he turned his back to the floor. She landed on top of him and he floated back upstairs with her laughing against his collarbone.

"Don't know…"

He kissed her. Fionna practically melted into him, cheeks cherry red. "Well then, I guess I'll just have to steal the last dance, won't I?"

.

Lord Monochromicorn was, for one reason or another, avoiding him. After Prince Gumball had told him his plan, the stallion had gotten nervous and not-so-subtly left him on his own.

The last time PG had seen him, he had been fervently Morse coding Cake, tapping out something along the lines of "it wasn't my idea, I know –" and then he couldn't catch the rest of it because Mrs. Cupcake was suddenly intercepting him.

"Do you think these muscles make me look unattractive?" She flexed and eyeballed her biceps.

Till about two hours to midnight, the strange blocks continued. Cinnamon Bun thought her green dress looked awful, which was odd because Cinnamon Bun didn't have the brain cells to discern awful from mathematical. Lumpy Space Prince had roped him into an argument (one-sided, mind you) about guy friends stealing his girls. Lollipop boy had nervously asked him for tips on how to talk to boys (and it took Prince Gumball a moment to determine the meaning behind that before he open-mindedly gave the boy some pointers. They were _candy_, for Gob's sake, could they even be gendered?). Even Peppermint Butler generated her own problems and only Prince Gumball himself could help any of them.

All the while, he appeared to be running away from Cake, though it took about four different conversations to conclude that, seeing as how she was a _cat_ that could change sizes and so knew very well the art of surprise.

He finally went into retreat mode and hid with Tree Trunks in a corner.

"You never have any ladies my age here," the old animal groused. He sniffed and his grey mustache twitched. "Tree Trunks would like some loving too, you know. I mean, look at all these couples!"

There weren't, actually, which could explain why everyone was suddenly not so happy. Here he was, throwing a ball to new love, and there was no love to be found. Except for Lord Monochromicorn and Cake, of course, but that was a given. If Fionna got here and saw all of this chaos… well, she would be highly suspicious! And not even her gullible heart would be able to save PG because then the inhabitants of Candy Kingdom would complain to her. They always did when something went wrong.

Heck, _he_ complained to her. She was very good at fixing problems.

He rubbed his temples. Think, think, think, think… He had to solve this before she arrived, everyone _had_ to be happy or else his entire plan would be ruined…

Eureka!

Fionna arrived at eleven, looking… normal, really. She hadn't bothered to wear a dress and carry a shmancy purse like the Gumball Ball. She was still beautiful, though, even in her blue adventuring outfit and bunny ears. And backpack. There would never be a day where she existed without her backpack, not since the last time.

He rather liked her startled look as she saw the corners filled to the brim with smooching couples. Prince Gumball had personally seen to it that everyone had found a significant other for the night. Of course it had taken quite a bit of hard work seeing as how they had had to be _compatible_ for the night as well. He was hardly going to be an idiot and couple some strangers together in hopes that they wouldn't come complaining back to him with Fionna on his arm. _No_, they had to be pleased the _entire_ night.

Understandably enough, as Fionna approached him, he was very tired of romance. And even more tired of kissing. And most _definitely_ through with dancing.

"Hey, I guess I know why it's called 'new love', huh?" She put her hands on her hips and watched everyone enjoy themselves first with warmth and then with childish disgust. "Eeeew, is that –?" When she squinted and discovered that they were indeed who she thought they were, she closed her eyes tightly and stuck her tongue out. "Wow, this is awkward."

She peeked one eye open at him. "I don't know about you, but I can only handle one superhero kiss at a time."

"I quite feel the same way right now."

"But you're hosting."

"It's a great shame, indeed."

She frowned at him and then spotted the dessert table some distance away from them. "SUGAR!"

The plan had been to ask her to dance and then woo her. By midnight, they were supposed to share a quixotic kiss.

PG followed behind her with the aura of a dead man. The very thought of dancing made him want to kick someone. "Say, Fionna, would you like to…" think, think, think, think… "play patty cake?"

Mouth full of wiggling gummies, she looked at him curiously. "Paddy pape?"

"Yes! It's rather fun, you see, here, just lift your hands like this and…" They spent forty-nine minutes on old nursery rhymes that he hadn't thought about in years. She knew none of them, and why would she? She'd been raised by _cats_. Her people interactions were limited to kicking and saving butts.

At least it was fun they could both agree on.

Only when it was time for the last dance did he force his tired soul to ask the question. "Fionna, would you do me the honor of dancing this last dance with me?"

She didn't blush, like he thought she would. She actually paled.

"Huh?"

"This last dance?" His confidence was slipping away. He grabbed it in two bubblegum hands and held with all his strength. "Would you dance it with me?"

"Oh, shoot!" She suddenly shoved him to the side and ran.

PG watched her go with growing confusion. Then, because she was his date, he went after her.

Prince Gumball caught up with Fionna about the fifth floor of the castle. He wasn't sure why she was so far away from the ball, but he supposed it was something he could ask her once he got hold of her.

She went into an empty room, stood on the balcony for a moment, and then leapt.

"FIONNA!" What was she _doing_? She was going to get herself killed!

Except, a moment later, she floated back up. PG watched from the doorway as Marshall Lee danced away with the adventurer, right across the night sky.

.

Marshall Lee stared past Fionna's shoulder towards the castle. There was an evil glint in his eyes.

Fionna pursed her lips and tried to look and see why.

"No, don't do that~" he spun them quickly and all she could see were the distant mountains. "It's more fun this way."

"_What's_ more fun?"

"Dancing!" He dipped her and then, without pause, dropped her. He grabbed her two feet from the ground and swept her back up to the sky. "Y'know, most people who are dropped this high up don't laugh like that."

She kept laughing anyway. "Do it again, man! This time, don't catch me." She grinned dangerously. "I wanna see if I can catch myself."

"Oh, yeah, 'cause falling from here wouldn't be fatal."

"Would it?"

Marshall Lee liked to think that her inability to relate to death came from hanging around the Candy Kingdom too long. Then again, it really could just be her. "'Course not." He'd catch her anyway. Over the years, he had perfected the art of letting her think that she got things done by herself. Otherwise, she'd send him to the nightosphere.

"Then what are you worrying about?"

"Heck if I know."

"Then let's do it!"

"Mmm… in a moment. Song's not over with yet."

"How do you know that? I can't hear anything, so it might as well…" Marshall Lee was baring all sharp teeth in a grin that said "hello, vampire king?" "_I_ can't hear the music, anyway," she finished weakly.

"We don't stop till _I_ can't hear it anymore." They twirled their way around stars.

"Can we do something else at least? Slow dancing is boring."

"It's classy."

She huffed and thumped her face against his throat. "Whatever, dude. Classy, boring, all sounds like the same thing."

"Well, if that's what you think…" He snapped her out, brought her back in, and then threw her over his head. She squealed as she completed a neat twirl, still holding onto him, and came back through between his legs. How their arms didn't get twisted painfully was a complete mystery that, really, could get categorized under "candy that walks and talks". "How's that for dancing?"

"Better!"

They kissed, short and hard because that was how Fionna did her battles and tongues became soldiers whenever pink battlefields met. He'd really have to break that habit of hers, but, meh, they had time.

He looked back to the now distant doorway where Prince Gumball had been standing. He wasn't there anymore but Marshall Lee still smirked.

Yep. He had time for _his_ girlfriend.

_Author's Note: My one friend got me into Adventure Time and then I ended up watching all the episodes and falling in love with Marshall Lee and Fionna._


End file.
